New Year, New Me...Sort Of

Greetings friends and follwers! The last time I spoke on this page was October 2025. Here we are in February of 2026 now! How time flies. I wish I could say that I was having fun...but that wasn't exactly the case...until more recently.

In my last update I told you all of my Lyme diagnosis. I am still struggling nearly daily with severe back, shoulder, leg, and neck pains. Sometimes to the point of immobility. I am considering my options carefully. I am doing my best to stay active and keep working as much as possible.

Now that I have updated that topic, I will update on the relationships in my life. I have introduced you to my mother in previous posts. She is still a narcessist. She is still worried more about outward appearances over actual accountability and honesty. But, I no longer have to deal with it. I'm sure some of you have seen the various "relationship" posts I have put on here and sometimes taken down from here. I am sure if you are a follower of the page, that you have gathered that I have not had good luck in love. I think I even said in one post somewhere that I was gonna be alone for the rest of my life. Well, it turns out, thankfully, I was wrong.

I met "The Firefighter" in December...having nothing to do with fires, btw. We met on an online dating site...started chatting, moved to phone voice chats, and then met/had our first date. After dinner on that first date, he deleted his dating profile...you read that right...DELETED IT! because he was so sure that I was it for him. Lucky for him, I felt the same way about him. We just clicked and we had just enough in common to really be able to bond and relate...but not so much that we couldn't learn from each other and challenge each other a bit. Our connection is beautiful. We spent a great deal of time together throughout December. Including the holidays, where he met my kids....and the darker side of me...and he handled it like a pro. I had a BPD meltdown in front of my new beux. I was positive he was gonna leave and never wanna see me again. He didn't. He supported me. He encouraged me. He kept me from making impusive decisions based on temporary emotions. He held me tightly while I self destructed. And then he reassured me and helped me get back on track. I knew then, I would be so stupid to let that man slip out of my life. I had to lock him down. My birthday is January 9. He took me on a weekend excursion to Chicago that weekend to celebrate with me. And that's when he proposed. Of course I said yes. We announced the engagement. And my family perfectly on cue, began their typical toxic bullshit. My mother, upset because I informed her she would not be invited or involved in said wedding, retaliated by telling me that after I became his wife, I would no longer be "her obligation". Silly me, I thought I was her DAUGHTER...but clearly, I was wrong. I was just a responsibility she had to bear for all these years, I guess. Anyway, that was her '"gentle" way of letting me know I had to get the fuck out after I got married. Which, of course I was moving in with my husband...but due to the fact that his small house was already filled with his sister that he was helping out and her teenaged son, and they weren't due to move out until mid to late February, it wasn't going to be possible for a few weeks.

I spoke with my fireman about the type of wedding he wanted and we discovered that we were both on the same page. The smaller the better. Less stress and anxiety. Fewer people to deal with. Less money to spend on a big show. We eloped on January 22, 2026. We ran off to Des Moines, IA with some friends. One of my friends performed the ceremony. The other was one of our witnesses. His old friend was the other. My youngest son came along as well. It was beautiful, romantic, and simple. We are still dealing with much of the toxic fallout from certain family members and friends on both sides that want to say that what we did was stupid. I say, they're just butthurt they weren't invited and they can get over it. If they truly cared about us, they'd want our happiness whether they were part of it or not.

After the wedding, due to my mother's desires, I packed my shit and moved the fuck out. Current living situation at his house is crowded and very uncomfortable. His sister is one of the naysayers and she's rude and manipulative. But as I write this, she has 16 days left here. And then she and her son will be gone. One way or another. Living elsewhere. I cannot wait.

In the meantime, I bide my time settling in where I can. Setting boudaries with the sister and her son. And trying to keep as much peace as I can with my new husband.

For those of you thinking that this was impulsive or my mental illness or that I constructed this or one of the zillion other things I have heard about My Firefighter and I marrying so quickly, you would be wrong. There are other reasons we did what we did.

1) We're both grown-ass adults and we don't need someone's permission or approval to do what we feel is right for us.

2) My Firefighter is 60. I am 49. We are not getting younger. Why waste time with rituals?

3) There are no real rules or structure to love and dating. So, who the fuck says that we have to know each other for years or whatever before we do what we did?

4) When it's right, it's right. You feel it in every cell of your body and you know with every fiber of your being. My Firefighter and I knew it was right.

As far as my mental health goes, I am taking it one day at a time. My anxiety has been high due to outside forces. I am doing regular "check-ins" with myself and keeping my husband alert and informed of my state and condition. It's been a challenge, yes. There are adaptations that need to be made on both our parts. But I think I am doing EXTREMELY well...and my husband and I are doing great.

Moral of the story? There's hope. Apply the therapy. Let go of the baggage and past. Make room for your glorious future. It's waiting for you.

Love Always,

Bree